Today is my sister’s birthday.  While she is my older sister, I won’t say how old she is.  If you ask her, she will tell you about how she spent the first three or four years of her life freezing cold.  You see, fire hadn’t been invented yet.  Her birth certificate weighs 73 pounds...it’s made out of limestone.  Most of the family was really proud of her since she was the first one to ever walk upright.  You know the hole in the middle of a wheel?  That was her idea.  To this day she can’t go in a cave without getting teary eyed thinking about the “good old days”.  She actually knew the Flintstones, but she swears they weren’t nearly as well off as they pretend to be on TV.  When she went to school, 7 was the highest number.  Her wedding dress took a week to hunt down...and skin out.

    Enough of that.  I hope she had a good birthday but didn’t have a cake with candles.  If she did everybody probably passed out due to oxygen depletion.